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Joke Home > Blonde Jokes

Blonde Jokes

Q: why do blondes have legs?
A: so they don't get stuck to the ground.
A2: to get between the bedroom and the kitchen.
A3: so they don't leave trails, like little snails.

Q: why do blondes have little holes all over their faces?
A: from eating with forks.

Q: why do blondes have more fun?
A: because they don't know any better.
A2: they are easier to keep amused.
A3: because they are easier to find in the dark.

Q: why do blondes have periods?
A: they deserve them

Q: why do blondes have see-through lunch box lids?
A: so they know if it is morning or afternoon.
A2: so that when they're on the train they can tell If they're going to work or coming home.

Q: why do blondes have TGIF on their shirts?
A: tits go in front.

Q: why do blondes have TGIF written on their shoes?
A: toes go in first.

Q: why do blondes have two more brain cells than a cow?
A: so that when you pull their tits, they don't moo.
A2: so they don't shit everywhere when you pull their tits.

Q: why do blondes have vaginas?
A: so guys will talk to them at parties.

Q: why do blondes like lightning?
A: they think someone is taking their picture.

Q: why do blondes like tilt steering?
A: more head room.

Q: why do blondes occupy about 90% of the net bandwidth?
A: because they keep accidentally deleting their copies of the blonde joke list.

Q: why do blondes put their hair in ponytails?
A: to cover up the valve stem.

Q: why do blondes take the pill?
A: so they know what day of the week it is.

Q: why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?
A: because, that's where you're supposed to wash vegetables!

Q: why do blondes wear earmuffs?
A: to avoid the draft.

Q: why do blondes wear hoop earings?
A: they have to have some place to rest their ankles.

Q: why do blondes wear panties?
A: to keep their ankles warm.

Q: why do blondes wear tampons?
A: because crabs like bungie jumping too.

Q: why do blondes wear their hair up?
A: to catch as much as they can that is over their heads.

Q: why do blondes wear tight skirts?
A: to keep their legs together.

Q: why do blondes wear underwear?
A: they make good ankle warmers.

Q: why do blondes work seven days a week?
A: so you don't have to retrain them on Monday.

Q: why do blonds have orgasms ?
A: so they know when to stop having sex !

Q: why do men like blonde jokes??
A: because they can understand them.

Q: why does a blonde have fur on the hem of her dress?
A: to keep her ankles warm.

Q: why does a blonde insist on him wearing a condom?
A: so she can have a doggie bag for later.

Q: why does a blonde only change her baby's diapers every month?
A: because it says right on it "good for up to 20 pounds."

Q: why does it work?
A: "does 3 come before e, between m and w, or at the end?"

Q: why does nasa hire peroxide blondes?
A: they're doing research on black holes.

Q: why don't blondes call 911 in an emergency?
A: they can't remember the number.

Q: why don't blondes double recipes?
A: the oven doesn't go to 700 degrees.

Q: why don't blondes eat ?
A: they can't figure out how to get two cups of water into Those little packages.

Q: why don't blondes eat pickles?
A: because they can't get their head in the jar.

Q: why don't blondes have elevator jobs?
A: they don't know the route.

Q: why don't blondes in San Francisco wear short black mini Skirts?
A: cause their balls show!

Q: why don't blondes like anal sex?
A: they don't like their brains being screwed with.

Q: why don't blondes like making kool-aid?
A: because they can't fit 8 cups of water in the little packet.

Q: why don't blondes make good pharmacists?
A: they can't get the bottle into the typewriter.

Q: why don't blondes talk when having sex?
A: their mothers told them not to talk to strangers.
A2: their mothers told them not with their mouths full.
A3: it's too tough to remember who she's with that day.

Q: why don't blondes use vibrators?
A: they chip their teeth.

Q: why don't blonds breast feed?
A: because they always burn their nipples.

Q: why don't they let blondes swim in the ocean?
A: because they can't get the smell out of the tuna.

Q: why is a blonde like a door knob?
A: 'cause everybody gets a turn.

Q: why is a blonde like a turtle?
A: they both get fucked up when they're on their back.

Q: why is a blonde like an old washing machine?
A: they both drip when they're fucked.

Q: why is a blonde like Australia?
A: they're both down under, and no one cares.

Q: why is a blonde like railroad tracks?
A: 'cause she's been laid all over the country.

Q: why is a washing machine better than a blonde?
A: because you can drop your load in a washing machine, and it won't follow you around for a week.

Q: why is it good to have a blonde passenger?
A: you can park in the handicap zone.

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